Sri Lanka - Eat, Surf, Repeat

If you’ve been to India and thought “Wow, that was way too intense, but I kind of liked the vibe and wouldn’t mind the same experience minus the chaos…”, then Sri Lanka may be for you! Much like Canada is America’s colder, friendlier hat, Sri Lanka is India’s warmer, less crazy teardrop. India is known as a bit of a traveler litmus test, in that some people love it and some people hate it, but most everyone agrees it’s not a relaxing experience. Having traveled to India on my own in 2018 for two weeks I was excited to return but also apprehensive. As luck would have it, our flight to India was canceled within a few days of booking it, and I took this as a sign to reroute our entire trip and go to Nepal and Sri Lanka instead of 6 weeks in India. 

But why did we choose Sri Lanka? Well, there was a direct flight from Kathmandu to Colombo, but other than that, I knew Sri Lanka had excellent food, lots of history, and more than a few beaches. It turned out to be a great decision, as we both loved our time there.

Ceylon it ain’t so

Quick rundown of recent Sri Lankan history - The Europeans came and pillaged, as they do. First the Portuguese, then the Dutch, then the British East India Company, then just the plain old British. The main focus on Sri Lanka was from its agriculture. Spices like cinnamon and nutmeg were valuable commodities, then coffee was imported, devastated by a disease, and replaced by tea. The pillaging continued until the end of the Second World War, and Sri Lanka became independent in 1948. 

It took less than a decade for the newly independent Sri Lanka to pass the Sinhala Only Act, which you can probably tell from the name wasn’t a nice thing. The Sinhalese people are the majority ethnic group of Sri Lanka, with about 75 percent of the population. The largest minority group are the Tamils, with about 11 percent. The Sinhalese are the "original” inhabitants of the island, with the Tamils being descended from Southern Indians that started to arrive in the 3rd century B.C. and experienced a second wave of immigration when the British controlled the island. 

Ethnic divisions were muted during British rule, mostly because the British were more concerned with extracting as much profit from Ceylon (Sri Lanka) as possible and didn’t particularly care about what they saw as internecine squabbles. Once they left, the Sinhalese took control and started to officially discriminate against the Tamils. The Sinhala Only Act, which declared Sinhalese to be the only official language of the island, didn’t go over too well with Tamils or left-leaning Sinhalese. This started decades of disenfranchisement of Tamils, which culminated in a brutal civil war from 1983-2009. The Tamil Tigers, an insurgent group, essentially took control of the Tamil dominated north of the country and the Sinhalese government in Colombo went to war with them.

At least 100,000 civilians were killed, 50,000 soldiers, and hundreds of thousands of people became refugees. War crimes were committed by both sides, and the small island nation was devastated. After the war ended, with the government forces defeating the Tamil Tigers, the country began to rebuild, especially in the north where most of the fighting had occurred. Since then Sri Lanka has been a standout among South Asian countries, with the highest HDI, good infrastructure, and a booming tourism economy. However, things got very messy in 2022, with mass protests against corruption and economic woes eventually culminating with a crowd storming the president’s home and forcing him to flee the country. Things are improving but there are still plenty of signs of the recent unrest, including a devalued currency, a prohibition on new cars entering the country, and occasional gas shortages.

Kottu, I barely know you!

You can’t talk about Sri Lanka without mentioning the food. It’s pretty damn good, especially after three weeks of the dreaded dhal bhat in Nepal. Sri Lankan food is of course strongly influenced by Indian cuisine, especially southern India, but it does carve out its own identity. This is, after all, a place that used to be known as “Spice Island” by European traders. A few dishes I highly recommend should you come across them:

Kottu - It’s flatbread chopped up into tiny chunks, fried, and then mixed with veggies, meat, and tons of spices. It’s like if you used fried bread for a stir fry instead of noodles, and it’s quite terrible for you but is delicious. 

Lamprais - Depending on the restaurant menu, also called “Lump Rice”, this dish came from the Dutch Burghers, a minority group in Sri Lanka, which in turn took inspiration from the food of Java. Lots of international influences in Sri Lanka. This is indeed a lump of rice along with meat and usually two or three curries wrapped up in a banana leaf and served piping hot. There is some sort of mysterious buttery magic going on inside, which is terrible for you but delicious.

Hoppers - Thin, bowl shaped pancakes made out of rice flour and filled with egg, curry, or whatever else is for breakfast that day. Terrible for you but delicious. 

King Coconut - A coconut endemic to Sri Lanka, the water tastes so damn good. I’m not a coconut water guy but this was heaven. They’re sold on every street.

Sri Lankan Curry Dinner - This isn’t a particular dish, but rather a conglomeration of several different traditional curries that you’ll find on offer at most places in Sri Lanka. You get a heaping serving of rice surrounded by 4 or more curries, which you then mix together with your fingers (if you’re eating like a Sri Lankan, which you should try) into a delightful mush. Not for people that like to keep their food separate. This one is actually not so terrible for you since it’s loaded with veggies, and it is still delicious.

Jaffna Crab - It’s a crab in curry, nuff said. 

Sweet as Kandy

Upon arrival in Sri Lanka we immediately caught a cab to the mountain town of Kandy, about two hours from Colombo. This was the beginning of a whirlwind 5 days in the mountains. Kandy is the typical beginning of this journey, and it’s worth a visit if only for the Temple of the Tooth. The Buddha’s tooth is here, and the temple is accordingly quite impressive with several daily processions. 

From Kandy we traveled to Nuwara Eliya, the heart of tea country. On the way to Nuwara Eliya we made a quick stop at Ambuluwawa Tower and I discovered two things: I am frightened of heights and it’s not a great idea to tramp around in the grass in Sri Lanka. For the heights - the Tower is a private project completed in 2006 and is a freakish Cinderella/Gaudi construction with a winding staircase running along the outside. Should you choose to ascend the staircase to the top there is absolutely no regulation of visitor numbers, and the width slowly narrows until only one person can barely make their way along. Should you encounter, say, a group of Russian tourists shouting loudly and smoking cigarettes so that they can only use one hand for stability, you’ll need to go backwards until you can shove yourself into a tiny alcove and allow the Russians to pass. They will not say thank you. 

After you complete your idiotic quest to the top, you can take a tuk tuk back down to the bottom of the mountain. If your tuk tuk breaks down halfway through the journey, and you need to wait for another, don’t kill the time by walking around in the grass. This is when a little fellow called the land leech will find his way onto your boot and through your socks. He’ll invite a few friends, feast upon your delicious American blood (high in sodium and fat), and they’ll be on their way in 5-10 minutes. You’ll never notice he was there until you tie your shoes and notice your socks are covered with blood.

After getting attacked by leeches and almost falling off a tower, we relaxed in Nuwara Eliya.  Also called “Little England”, it sits at one of the highest elevations in Sri Lanka and is refreshingly cold and rainy. When the British started cultivating tea in Sri Lanka, the industry centered around this area. You can take a tour of a tea plantation, enjoy high tea, and imagine you’re staying at a little cottage in the English countryside. Are there packs of stray dogs roaming the streets in the English countryside? 

Dogs and leeches aside, Nuwara Eliya was quite charming and I wanted to spend more time there. Alas, we had a tight schedule and made our way to Ella the next day, another mountain town a bit lower in elevation and home to many excellent hikes. One of the main attractions in Ella is the railroad tracks leading directly into town. You can walk on these at any time, just beware of trains, dogs, leeches, and tourists doing Instagram photo shoots. Several times a day the train crosses the Nine Arch bridge, and it’s a must-see event. There is also excellent food in Ella, and lots of bars and restaurants to while away the evening. This area of Sri Lanka is a gem well worth visiting.

Photo Descriptions

1. Temple of the tooth

2. Narrowness of the hell pathway up the tower

3. View from near the top

4. Leech aftermath

5. High Tea

6. Christmas in Sri Lanka

7. Nine Arches Bridge

8. Sunny day hike

9. On the way to town

Surfing SRI

After the mountains we traveled to the shore to take part in a one week surf/yoga retreat. This was a highly anticipated activity for both of us, and it did not disappoint. Weligama is a town known for its ideal sand break which is good for beginner surfers. There are dozens of surf schools in town, all offering the same basic deal: group accommodation, meals served on site, and 1-3 daily surf lessons along with theory and video analysis of your screw ups. Being old we made sure to find a place that had private rooms as well as dorms. Best decision of the trip.

We learned how to surf, barely, but what I really want to talk about is how freaking old we are. You don’t really notice the years passing by until you’re sitting down at a group dinner and the average age is 25. You look around and think, “Yeah, they’re younger than me but not by so much.” Then somebody suggests going to the club after dinner. You politely mention that the surf lesson the next morning is at 6am, and shouldn’t we get some sleep? They look at you like you’re an idiot and carry on their conversation about Bad Bunny without you. The club will not miss you. You are Methuselah. Death approaches. Who or what is Bad Bunny? 

Encroaching senility aside, we had a great time surfing and met some lovely people at the surf camp. We made friends with yet another German, Matthias, this time from Düsseldorf, completing our German Pokemon collection with friends from the North, East, South, and West. Although younger than us, Matthias respected his elders and often helped us up the steps to our room when we got too tired to make it up without assistance. 

Sunset and cricket by the beach

Beach Madness

We’d already been at the beach for a week, but we hadn’t really been at the beach, you know? Surfing twice a day in sewage water and wondering if that rash on your foot was from the board leash chafing you or from some flesh eating amoeba isn’t my definition of “beach time”. For the last three days in Sri Lanka we moved a few dozen kilometers up the coast to a wider, sandier, beachier beach. And what we saw there was a carnival of horrors, each image burned into our brains as more shocking than the last. Please enjoy this photo essay of those horrors.

Photo Descriptions

1. A man walking a monkey on a leash

2. A man forcing a dog to surf

3. A hole in the sand which we learned was a technique employed by Russian tourists (there are many many Russian tourists in Sri Lanka) to cool down during the day. The Russholes dotted. the landscape as a stark reminder of man's adaptable nature. Do not approach a Russhole without knowing what is inside.

4. A friendly beach dog. One of many.

5. The Russian tourist in his native habitat, napping with a pillow of beer cans.

6. And to show it wasn't all animal cruelty and drink Russians, here is Laura being smashed by a wave. Also there was a dead cat in the water but nobody wants a picture of that.

Joking aside, we had a great and relaxing time before flying out of Sri Lanka. It made both of our lists of “Countries to return to” especially since we didn’t have time to explore the north, where that delicious Jaffna crab resides. If you’re considering a trip to Sri Lanka but not sure if it’s worth the long flight, go for it. Just bring some thick socks for the leeches.